JOURNAL 15: counselling awareness

Assalamualaikum =)

‘Did the counselling is the good course to study? Isn’t it based on the Western theory only? We have religion so counselling is useless.’ –this is what my friends asked.

Due to it’s a sudden question, I can’t answer it well and part of my heart almost believe what they said. Yes, most of the counselling theory is based on Western perspective. Then, we study it and apply it to the client.

We take the courses that can help us to help client in the way that they are in, but the thing is quite subjective due to there is no absolute syllabus that we, the student, can refer if there is any problems that is related with client.

‘Why there is no book regarding with counselling that is for Malaysian or Muslim even we know the Western counselling book is quite bias based on their value and culture?’ –I wondered.

In class, we also learn the subject based on the Western books. Even there is book from Muslim scholar, the syllabus mostly from the Western book just small part of t on the Muslim scholar book. Regarding with this issue, I would like to suggest that the lecturer should ask the student to refer on the Muslim scholar book rather than Western book, so that the student could master the Islamic counselling very well.

There are few books written by Malaysian psychology or counseling student in the market, however, the books only translate a Western book not giving new information to student especially about the different practice that the Malay counsellor should practice while helping their client.

While going through with the syllabus in this class, cross-cultural counselling, I do feel like for every country, we must have our own textbook, counselling intervention, counselling theory, etc if we want to be success in this filed. It is not the big problem if we referred to the Western counselling books, but we must produce our own counselling guideline to be a good helper and to make others believe on us.

‘We are waiting for your generation to produce our own counseling books, belong to Muslim.’ –my lecturer said.

We feel highly motivated. InshaAllah, one day we will come up with our own standard of counselling that is suitable with Muslim as well as Malaysian. Too many works to do, to many reading and research need to be done. May Allah help us to accomplish this. Aminn.

Thank you for reading =)

(read more)

JOURNAL 14: LGBT??

 WHAT SAY YOU?

Based on the discussion we had today, I am very sure that almost all of us still cannot accept LGBT to be legalized in Malaysia. Here we started to make ourselves thinking whether to accept what is everybody accepting or withhold with our Islamic principal.

So, what do you say? Start thinking our future counselor!

It is really hope that we as future counselors enable to make a proactive action in dealing with this issue. 

In my humble personal opinion, we are not counselor in first, but we are Muslim at first. So, we have to deal with LGBT client as they are Muslim by prohibitting them being a LGBT with a therapeutic manner. The confrontation must be done in a very subtle way. I say this because we are responsible on our action in the hereafter. If we showed the client to follow the wrong and sinful path, it is not only the client will burden the punishment, but as well as us too!

Thank You.

(read more)

JOURNAL 13: pantai timur Malaysian culture

Assalamualaikum =)

we did say in this blog that Malaysian is more group-oriented compared to religious-oriented. but we found it quite not really true. 

this is because while there is Ustaz Azhar Idrus ceramah at Gombak, we saw that there are lots of people there. most of them is Pantai Timur people.

how we know? we heard they speak Pantai Timur language. everywhere. all spoke the Pantai Timur slang. to be in that community it's quite interesting.

'dari mano?' -a aunty asked us.

'dari UIA.' -we answered.

'kelate ko? ko ganu?' -she continued the question.

'tak la mak cik, dari negeri-negeri lain. saja datang, nak dengar ceramah ustaz.' -we replied.

she smiled. and praised us for our effort to come to the ceramah.

yes, not so many teenagers be in that kind of event. 

be in there, we feel like we are in the others state. the sellers, the people around us, the kids. everything! without denying, people in Pantai Timur is quite religious. looks at the students in the IIUM, most of the religious courses dominated by the Pantai Timur student. why this happen? 

it's still be in the no answered question. perhaps we can do research on it one day? inshaAllah.... =)

that's it for this entry. do visit this blog again and read our next-interesting-entry.

thanks for reading. =)

(read more)

IMMERSION 5: Picture from temple

Assalamualaikum =)

 'SRI AYYANAREESWARA' temple in Wangsa Maju.

  Dhotti

One of their god

Main Entrance 1

Main Entrance 2

(read more)

JOURNAL 12: banjarian

Banjarian

Last Saturday, there was big event in my house. In the morning, my parent makes doa selamat for our new house and there have engagement event for my beloved sister in the evening. At that day, many people came such as neighbors, friends, aunties, nephews, and other relatives. All of them come to give some help. We together cook the dish at surau that near to my house and it make the atmosphere become happening. I still remember about one incident that happen during I make gubahan bunga for my sister’s hantaran, one of my auty which is banjarian was asked me, she said:

“Napa diulah?”

I am not answering anything, but I wonder, Haaa…? What is that?? So after that you know what I am doing? I just smile at her.. hehe.. (^_^)

Actually the meaning in bahasa malayu is “buat apa tu?” haha.. it is so different right? i also learn another word at that day, such as:

Berbah stumat (tidur sekejap)

Guring (baring)

Haloi (halus)

Besides that, I also learn about how to make one of banjarian traditional kueh which is “wadai kepeng”. The taste is so delicious! I like it very-very much and until today I still remember the taste. Actually, this traditional kueh have it symbolic. Usually this kueh will make for celebrate any happy event such as kenduri kahwin, engagement day, eid fitri/adha and so on. It is very suitable to make as a dessert.

Truly speaking, I am quite sad because I did not able to speak and understand banjar language. It is because my father only speaks in banjar when we back to his village. So, my sibling and I will not really understand what our relatives said if they speak by using fully banjar language. Thus, it makes us become silent and only listen to them. Even I am not fluent in that language, but I can understand certain word and still learn about it by asking my father. So, at least I have certain word that I can use when I speak with my relatives.

(read more)

IMMERSION 4: Quick peek to temple!

"Vanakam"
Salam and hi there. Why I said 'vanakam' earlier? It is because we a got chance to visit this temple located at Wangsa Maju near the LRT Station. Those people are so friendly and welcoming us fully hearted I guess since they always smiling to us. Uncle explain to us briefly about their culture and religion since the President of that temple is not there because of his wife is sick. So we just know basically about them.

Are they fasting? Can women who are dirty cannot visit death ceremony? Did teenagers involve in their activities or prayer? Are they accept outsiders to be in their group?

Those question will be answered in the Journal. From our short interview, we get to know their ritual activity, what food they consume and also some of they can do and what not. On 5th May they will have their own ritual and they invited us to come since we can know deeper about their culture.

It feels so great to know their culture and feels like to come there again. Oh one thing we hate the most is there's a dog in the temple so we quite afraid of it but the uncle take care of us very well. So we are able to not get bitten :P

The pic of their gods and our sweet memory will come later ya! Wait up!! Thanks for reading :). Havva good days pals.

(read more)

IMMERSION 3: Interview with Foreigner

Assalamualaikum..

Yesterday we managed to interview one foreigner from Iraq for our immersion project. This is the second task which first we go to Kampung Orang Asli. We choose foreigner because we want to know the differences between their culture and our culture and how they feel to be in our group.

Lots of things she share with us like in terms of their food, clothes, weather, and etc.Fyi, jubah and abayya is different actually. For them, our jubah is like a dress only. And, at first she feels culture and weather shock when she come to Malaysia and it takes like some time for her to be adapted with the situation.

For historical impact, she said that her area is not affected by the war since she is in the north side. For south area which is Baghdad, they had great impact on their economy and etc as you know war that happens to them.

We feels so excited listening to her story about their country and if Allah's will, we want to go there as to experience the four season, summer, autumn, winter and spring as in Malaysia we only have one season only.

Listening to her :)

(read more)

JOURNAL 11: “PALLI PALLI”

When you visit other countries, you can easily pick up a few native words. Most foreigners say that one of the first Korean words they learn is "ppalli ppalli," literally meaning "hurry hurry." Guus Hiddink, former head coach of the Korean national football team, once said, "The first Korean words I learned were ppalli ppalli." Not only foreigners but also local Koreans list "ppalli ppalli" as a symbol of Korean mentality. The word is easily heard in a restaurant when ordering food, when dropping clothes off at the laundry, when riding in a taxi and so on.

"Ppalli ppalli" can be often translated as "Hurry, hurry" or "Quickly, quickly." It is something more than just hastiness and saving time. The term is intensively goal-oriented and connotes finding the most efficient way to reach that goal. The word also shares some common elements with flexibility. This flexibility is the reason "ppalli ppalli" is sometimes criticized for being the main culprit of big accidents. Occasionally in order to attain goals quickly, procedures and regulations are neglected. Bad and sometimes dangerous results are the consequence.

However, the word has a great positive impact on Korean society and the economy. Its positive results can also be found in government policies and the provision of public services. The Five-Year Economic Plans can be mentioned as typical examples of "ppalli ppalli" in the public policy area. Public services are provided much more quickly in Korea than in most other countries. City gas is provided on the very day you move into a new house. Various civil application documents are issued in real time on request when you visit the office for civil services.

In Malaysia I think we do not have the word that mostly used and referred it as Malaysian word to be remembered, we only be known by our variety of food and others. We should make Korea as an example to achieve our goal as industrial country by 2020.

Go Malaysia...

(read more)

JOURNAL 10: A bussines in a week

Hello readers.. Wishing all of u having a blissful day now n afterwards..

Here I tell u, *alhamdulillah last week, we have given an opportunity to open a small business in conjunction of Edu Fest 2012 ... We opened it at counseling booth with only one small table beside it. Honestly it is such a wonderful experience we had throughout the week. We learn so many things which are beneficial in our daily life in being a counselor next.

The first n foremost thing we learnt how important communication skills are. This is so much vital as we have to communicate all the longg day to many people include our customers, supplier, n also our team-mates... N of course all of them have different kind of attitude n different way of responding from us. Despite of their nationality, gender n country of origin, they are all colorful! This very challenged our patience somehow. 

Related to a case we have once discussed in class, regarding case of Ellina Martinez, we as counselor firstly cannot impose any values especially the negative ones to others. Counselor have to understand that they might behave in certain ways just because of their upbringing n culture.We cannot easily take it into the heart and have just to accept them as the way they are. This is what we practice on when we deal with people who visit our stall n our team-mates. Although it is actually a lesson to be practice in the counseling profession, I think we have to start practice to behave just like a counselor from now on in order to make us a good counselor later on. Insyallah..

Since we opened up the stall with our own capital n risk, we have undergone experience of scared to loss. It is our first experience working together selling foods like nuggets, sausages, meat burgers, n seafood balls. We have worked very hard on it. By opening our stall early in the morning, we end it at 12AM everyday in the week. Having a physical movement here and there, bounded with other responsibilities, it such a tiring experience actually. As one of our goals is to make profit n avoid loss, everyone playing role and responsible in successive this because it is not one person money, but six people's capital.

In counseling, clients will be also having goals and targets which are needed to be facilitated by counselor. Therefore, I really hope we will continue to have this spirit because this enable to make us a good counselor also. A counselor should always have the spirit of responsibility and earnestly helping the client to feel better and making decision.

I think that is all for today. Hoping to write again later. See you again! :)

(read more)

IMMERSION 2: Kampung Orang Asli, Gombak

Assalamualaikum =)

we went to the Kampung Orang Asli, Gombak for our immersion project. we chose the aboriginal people because we feel that they are the minority people in this country that we need to give attention to them. so we want to know more about this group of people that is why we go to this group.

on the day we did the interview with the 'tok batin' of that kampung, we felt the tok batin is quite friendly. we feel like we have a chat with the elder people in our own village. he knows how to make joke, how to make us interested to listen what he said, etc. in conclusion toward this, we don't feel any differences while communicating with him. just for some word of him, we can't understand it well. but we manage to catch the meaning of what he said.

in the end of the chat, the tok batin told us about his opinion regarding with the Malaysia law which prohibit the young children to get married. he said due to this law, the case of abortion of the baby become worst from day-to-day. besides that, because of this law, the teenager start doing the free sex here and there. so that the social ills expand form time-to-time.

when listen to this statement, we feel like, 'yes every people in this country, think about this issue and really want this issue to be end.' 

so again, as a future counselor, we might think the social issue is one of the big problem and we must help the people outside there to overcome this issue.

thank you for reading. =)

(read more)

JOURNAL 9: understand your culture.

Assalamualaikum =)

in the class, we did learnt about the Asma & Pedersen talk about Malaysian culture. i got many precious information during this class time. 

sometimes, we don't realize how our culture is, till someone bring it up and let us think about it. besides that, we only can understand our culture by looking and investigating others culture. what i mean is, how we want to understand it's our culture if we never see the others culture first? 

while reading what Asma & Pedersen talk about the Malaysian culture, me and my group did feel like, 'yes, this is us!' and for some negative statement like, 'Malaysian culture is more relationship than task-oriented' we did some argument and find some example in order to make ourselves clear with what we stand. from it, we start realize, yes, this is us! this is what we belong to.

basically based on what the Asma & Pedersen talk about Malaysian culture, we could agree except for 'more religious than secular'. even though majority of the Malaysian is the Muslim, to ensure that all the things that Malaysian do is based on religious matter only is cannot be seen as the completely true. 

back to the early discussion of 'more group than individual-oriented'. most of the group in the class said it is correct. and we do accept that the Malaysian normally doing thing based on what the group had agreed upon compared to what individual decision. when we talk about group-oriented, it is not guaranteed that the group is emphasizes the religious matter. there are many groups of Malaysian, do not take the religious as the main source of life.  so that the assumption of Malaysian is more religious compared to secular is cannot be accept as completely true. it is so subjective and depends on which group that the people is belong to.

in conclusion, while having this kind of activity in this class, we do feel like it is importance for each of us to understand what is the culture is all about. the best way to understand our culture is by make the comparison about us with others. by that, we can understand it clearly and correctly.

thank you for reading. ;)

(read more)

IMMERSION 1: Teaser..

From right; Solehah, Aisha, Tok Ulang, Ummu, Alya.

(Najihah is the one snapped the picture)

See what we have done on our Immersion Project.. :)

Such an exciting experience.

Meeting Tok Ulang, a Tok Batin at Kg. Orang Asli Batu 10, Gombak..

^____^

Peace!

(read more)

JOURNAL 8: Tips and Strategies to Avoid Employment Obstacles

Salam and hi...

Today I want to share what we have discuss in previous class regarding problems with current model in terms of the barriers to get a job such as stereotypes, prejudices, discrimination, language and cultural differences. Those are the causes why some of us hard to get into certain area of work and I don't deny that since in Malaysia itself, we practiced this. 

So, I did read an article that helps us to encounter this barriers. There are some tips to avoid this issues like:

1) Learn new skills. Eg : learn multiple languages

2) Develop a good response in yourselves : try to answer questions with confidence

3) Adjust personality outlook : get the right attitude

Those are the tips for us to get a job. But, as a future counselor, we are the change agent like Dr. Siraj has said in the class. As the change agent, we need to understand other's values so that we can help our client. In America they  have law in EEOA (Equal Employment Opportunities Act). So they can imply discrimination toward the worker or job seeker.

It will be good if in Malaysia we have that kind of law. All are deserve to get job with their own qualifications. :)

(read more)

JOURNAL 7: Be Ready!

Why do students from different races always quarrel at school? Every races have their own opinion that make their races and culture are superior than others, but they cannot accept other races opinion or culture differences. 


Sometimes students always make joke about each other cultures, which are the reason why they are fighting. They start to 'mengutuk' each other and make fun about it. How teachers will react when they face this situation? 

Counsellors can take action on this issue by doing a program which can gather all races and give some vulnerable input that at the end they can realize that they need each other and they have to respect others if they want to be respected by others too.

School counselors need to be train especially how to describe the effect of a person who has made threat. so that, counselor can handle the case well and can put some effort to harmonize this students situation.


One to one counseling session may not work to them, counselor should make a support group and discuss the issue very well. The important thing is that, all of them should have a same goal that they want to achieve. The goal should bring good impact to all.


To all counselors, we need to prepare ourselves to face all those situation...:)

(read more)

JOURNAL 6: Malaysian vs non-Malaysian

Malaysian vs non-Malaysian

Currently, I do work part time as a seller of health products. We had a booth that nearer to fruit stall. So, many people will pass by there. I meet with many people either from Malaysia, Chinese, Korea, Thailand, and many other countries. However, I can saw a difference between the Malaysian and non-Malaysian. Usually I would greet the person who passed by my booth. For example I will say... 

"can you spend your time for a while?"

or 

“can I use your time? just a minutes"

From the questions, various reactions I get.

From Malaysian:

"sorry,... saya xde mase nie,,"

"produk ape nie? xpelah... lain kali je la ye,," 

"owh, xpelah.... dah ada dah"

From non-Malaysian:

“Actually, i have no time, but i will spend about a minute"

"emm.. okay, but make it short"

“I’m sorry, I have class, but I will come later”

So, can you see the differences between Malaysian and non-Malaysian? How their response? For non Malaysian, although they do not have the time, they still give some time for me to explain about the products that I sell. However, it is differ with Malaysian people especially Malay. Sometimes I did not finish my words yet, but they already said “no, thanks”. If this situation happens, I always said to myself “it is okay, there have many more customers” or “maybe today is not my day”. 

From this experience, I was learned many thing. Besides I had learned the ways to convey and convince other person, soon, when I become a counselor, I could be ready with reluctant client. I will not quickly angry and give up if the client did not want to come to counseling session. However, I will try to find another solution to ensure they will attend the session. For example, I will meet the client personally and explain to them about what they will get from the session. So, I will try my best to convince my client to come to the counseling session because i know they need help.^^

 

(read more)

JOURNAL 5: Culture vs Religion?

Somehow, in some situation, our culture made us contradict with Islamic way of practice.

Let us see how it goes..

1. Our culture teaches us to give money for those who performed solat jenazah as a note of appreciation, but Islam discouraged us to do so.

2. Our culture teaches us to give salam to empty house to show respect to the 'guardian of the house', while Islam never teaches us to believe that way.

3. Our culture teaches us to perform the 'bersanding' during wedding ceremony for the reason to show the new bride/groom to relatives and people who come, however Islam not allowed this to be conducted as it will create fitnah to the bridegroom as well as the whole family.

4. Our culture teaches us to attend wedding ceremony and give some amount of money to host of the house, and it is not what Islam teaches us.. (usually happen at Kelantan)

5. Our culture teaches the groom to wear henna at the 3 end fingers, and for the bride to paint the hands with flower motive to beautify it, and Islam does not encouraged it somehow.

picture courtesy from here

There are actually many other issues can be rise up, but what I can think for the time being are all these. Basically it is all happened during cultural ceremony takes place such as wedding, eid celebration, etc.

I believe that Islam has put some consideration to allow the culture ritual to be conducted as long it is not associating Allah to any form of things. But I am not really sure that Islam really prohibit it or not.

We somehow unintentionally follow the culture as we follow our fathers n mothers doing so, without relating it Islamic teaching, and without knowing it is allow to be followed or not.. And usually we started to notice it after we had practice it for a long time, periodically after when we have grown up as we learn and we may see differences between us to others.

Here we started to confuse whether to follow culture or religion?

What will you do?

I also sometime confuse. But what I do is follow Islam of course. But can I able to stop practicing it since other people are still doing it, and the family asks me to do it too? It is a little bit difficult, but still can be change actually. Even with a drop of determination, we still can change our family from practicing culture rituals which contradict with Islamic teaching...

That is all for now.. Thank you for reading.. :)

(read more)

JOURNAL 4: accent of language

Try to read this with British accent:

"Hey.What are you trying to do with my dress? or "Well, I used to speak fluently. Don't you think so?

And, try to read this with no accent at all

"Hey. What are you trying to do with my dress? or "Well, I used to speak fluently. Don't you think so?

Can you detect the differences between there is an accent and if there is no accent at all in speaking? Okay and are you don't understand if I don't use any accent when I'm speaking English? Well I guess the meaning of the saying is more important than the accent of it.

I faced the situation above today. I heard from a friend of mine had who conversation with her friends and they talk about the accent in speaking English. From what I have heard, they said that their university has a good quality of English compared to ours. Well, its quite disappointing and sad when I heard that. Is it our fault for don't have any accent in our speaking? Truthfully, we are less in speaking English since we know that in our field of work, we will speak in Malay language at school. So, we don't bother so much about it.

What I am trying to say here is that, even though we don't have any accent in speaking, but we did know how to speak English and people can understand it rather that we use accent that others could not understand what we says.. Those who have accent in their speaking then it is credit for them since people will like"WOW!! It so great for having that style" or "Untunglaa pandai cakap orang putih ada slang". 

There are some tips for improving English according to them (a friend of mine and her friends):

* Read English books a lots

* Watch English movie frequently

* And last but not least, speak with your friends using English

Oh I think I just expressing my feeling here and now I feel so relived. Sorry for that. As a future counselor, we should not be that way like judging people from their way of speaking and as for me, I should be open and accept their criticizes so we are able to improve ourselves. Just bear in mind that people are like the colors. We do have different side of view. Thank you :)

(read more)